Kid optimisation or chaos surfing?

Yesterday I was left in a quandary by a very interesting post was passed my way by the good algorithms at del.icio.us.  Asha Dornfest of Parent Hacks has a guest post at Zen Habits; there is a parent hacking mentality that seeks to make life easier by taking the philosophy of ‘take it, break it and use it to your advantage’ and applying it to life.  These good men and women who taught me, among other things, to use ice-cube trays as paint easels.

Asha writes about getting organised as a backbone of ‘optimised’ parenting, along with a top list of other bits to read.  But it’s a sentiment that I’m in the uncomfortable position of agreeing with while at the same time finding it gives me the chills.

Now I’d be about 6th in line to admit to an inner geek; behind wife, kids, parents and dog. It’s those little things like hoarding broken computers or - more practically -being I’m awfully proud of syncing my phone via Plaxo with Mrs. Welikeplay’s pda so we can share diaries and get some time together as a family.  But I’ve been in child centred work for a long time now, and if I had a penny for every child I’ve met who’s been subjected to too much organised parenting I’d nearly be able to buy myself a coffee.  Organisation in a parent is all well and good as long as it doesn’t get in the way of getting things wrong in the messiness of living.

I’ve a hunch that one of the most useful skills we can impart to the kids in our care is the ability to, when needed, surf the crest of chaos.  Now don’t get me wrong I’m not saying ditch the diary ,and the piano lessons, and the hockey club, and the ballet, and the museums; rather I’m extolling a middle way which allows for hanging out and doing little but creating space for imagination to arise.  Being organised enough to allow for disorganisation.  Being structured enough to alow for structure to crumble.

How to? It’s been some time since I’ve let my own monkey-boys be ‘boss for the day’.  It’s an unparalleled act of chaos and empowerment… which ain’t going to be happening too often to become routine, ‘cos that’s the point.

tag... playpeople, play, running wild